Number 26. I never imagined what I would be doing when I turned 26. I didn’t think I would still be living in Ohio and I didn’t think I would still be trying to figure out what I’m going to do with my life. I thought I would be married. I thought I would be in the middle of my career and I thought that all the hard questions in life would be so far behind me that I would actually need to ponder on them for a while in order to remember what they were.
I can only control so much and for that which I can’t control, I become anxious. Honestly, I don’t know what happens next. There are so many different possibilities and I can’t actually fathom what they all mean. I care about my future and I can about my fate. I care about other peoples’ futures and fates as well and part of me wants them to intermingle and another part of me wants them to soar in such fantastic ways.
I have so much going for me that sometimes I don’t know how to process it all. I’m reminded of the charge I presented my audience with during my TED talk. I said “you need to step out into the uncertainty-outside of your comfort zone.” I have to remember that.
I didn’t get this far by treading in the shallow end, I already took a risk-when I moved to Ohio. Is it possible that I found and obtained everything I was looking for? Is it possible that greater things await? I’m certain they do and the sooner I remember that, the sooner I’ll be content with where I’m headed.
No one said I had to have all the answers, but at least now I know where to find them.